The Genius Zone - Unlock Your Inner Genius

Ep. 7 – Advanced Negotiation Communication Strategies

• Catherine Mattiske • Season 1 • Episode 7

Share episode

Do you want to become an expert negotiator? Are you ready to unlock the power of your Inner Genius and discover the keys to successful communication and negotiation strategies?

In this episode of The Genius Zone, host Catherine Mattiske shares her wisdom on how to identify and manage key issues in any negotiation situation. You will gain insight into the delicate art of communication and negotiation, and how to use your own Inner Genius to become a master negotiator.

Catherine shares how you can:

  • Leverage your Inner Genius to become a master negotiator
  • Develop trust and rapport during negotiations
  • Use active listening techniques
  • Maintain composure and remaining calm in difficult situations
  • Strategically manage expectations throughout the negotiation process

Don't miss out! Gain insight into the art of communication and negotiation, and how to use your own Inner Genius to become a master negotiator.

Take your first step… Unlock your Inner Genius (GQ) today! Take the Inner Genius Profile here.

Learn more about the Inner Genius Profile on our website.

RESOURCES MENTIONED

RELATED RESOURCES

Thank you for listening! Make sure to subscribe on your favorite platform so that you never miss an episode.

--
Subscribe for the latest GQ News & Insights!

Catherine Mattiske, best known for creating ID9 Intelligent Design & the Genius Quotient (GQ), is a leading light in the corporate learning & team-building industries. She regularly works with large & small organizations to help team members better understand one another while effectively collaborating & boosting individual & team morale & productivity in the workplace.

Connect with Catherine on LinkedIn

Do you have a question about something you heard today, or would you like to suggest a topic? Do you know someone who’d be a great podcast guest? Or would you like to book Catherine as your guest? Contact Catherine

Find more Podcasts, Resources & Products on GQ Academy

Discover the latest GQ Research & Science Here | Read Catherine’s blog on GQ Playbook | Join The Genius Zone on LinkedIn

Follow us: LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube

SPEAKERS

Carl Richards, Catherine Mattiske

Carl Richards  00:06

You've entered the Genius Zone where we explore the secrets to unlocking your Inner Genius. Your host, Catherine Mattiske brings her years of knowledge and experience in developing the Inner Genius Profile. Let's dive in and see what's in store for today. This podcast episode is taken from a previous live event. 

Welcome, everyone. Today we are thrilled to have Catherine Mattiske joining us for an enlightening conversation about Advanced Negotiation Communication Strategies. Catherine Mattiske is renowned for writing 31 books, and is the creator of Inner Genius. She's written three books on the topic of negotiation. They are Negotiating For Success, Negotiating For Success: The Next Step and Negotiating The Million Dollar Deal. Now Catherine has over 30 years of experience as a professional trainer, consultant, and negotiator. She has a wealth of knowledge to share and we are excited to have her guiding us through this session. She's been a guest on podcasts, including mine. Personally, she's become a mentor, a professional colleague, and is becoming a good friend as well. 

So, today she's discussing the delicate art of communication and negotiation and how to use your Inner Genius to become an expert negotiator. It's something that I'm sure we all are excited to be jumping into. So get ready for some great insights and strategies you can use immediately. Now at the end of the session today, we will provide a free download that includes Catherine's book, Negotiating For Success, an activity book and a downloadable negotiating planning tool as well. So stay tuned for that, Catherine. Welcome.

Catherine Mattiske  01:44

Hello, hello. Hello, everyone. Great to see you all here.

Carl Richards  01:48

It's fantastic to have you here. I'm so glad you've taken time to share with us today, you have so much insight and wisdom that you bring to the table every time you speak. So what key insights and strategies should readers take away from your books on negotiation? Let's jump right there.

Catherine Mattiske  02:02

So I wrote the three books on negotiation. And why did I write three? Because it was a big topic. And these books are all learning short takes. And so they're designed as like mini training courses with activities. And as you just said, The Negotiation Planner. And I think one of the biggest things is people go into negotiations raw, unprepared. So, the one thing I think that readers can gain insights into and strategies is how to leverage their Inner Genius to become this term that I call The Master Negotiator. The number one thing is being prepared and we can talk about that today. And also understanding the importance of developing trust and rapport with whoever you're negotiating with. 

I think active listening techniques is absolutely key for me, I know. And for people that know me, I think one of the biggest things is maintaining my composure in really difficult situations, and also strategically managing expectations throughout the process as well. And so in addition, it's really about creating that Win-Win outcome for everybody. And so using this set of books, and I know today will give you the first one in that set, the aim is to really equip not only you with the knowledge, but also tools because that's what I do. I say, Well, okay, here's an interesting thing. Here's the theory, but also, how do I do it? So what's the tool? So I added all of those, Carl as well.

Carl Richards  03:31

Maintaining composure, it's interesting, you mentioned that one, because I think that's one that a lot of us struggle with when we have to have difficult conversations or go into negotiation, which I guess is also a difficult conversation or can be. Being able to maintain that, I call it a poker face, I don't know if that's the correct terminology or not, but maintain that level of professionalism or whatever it is to move on to whatever it is that needs to get done. 

Exactly. All right. So the information that is shared in the chat now is where you can find those 31 books. By the way, they're all there. Thanks, Mel for posting that in the chat. Inner Genius and the Genius Quotient is something that I'm learning more about as we go and thank you so much for introducing me to it. It's already had some amazing impacts in my business and my life, but you're the creator of Inner Genius. How have you seen the principles of Inner Genius apply to successful negotiations? How's that?

Catherine Mattiske  04:23

Yeah I've seen (the) power of Inner Genius utilized in negotiations time and time again. Knowing your own Inner Genius Profile, but most importantly, the profiles of those people that you're negotiating with, gives you the Secret Sauce. It gives you the incredible advantage. Helps you to provide a really clear understanding of why people say what they do. Because sometimes when you're in a negotiation, you're thinking what on earth is driving this angle that they're going on? And how then you can best communicate with them to reach your desired outcome, it really does give you that incredible advantage.

Carl Richards  05:03

How does using your Inner Genius, and how does this give you the upper hand, or how does this give you the advantage when you're in that negotiating process then?

Catherine Mattiske  05:10

So if you think about great negotiators, those people who do negotiation for a job, they really understand themselves, and they can apply what they know, into every negotiation to get that successful outcome. When we understand ourselves better, and we understand what drives other people, we're more likely to negotiate in a way that takes everyone's needs into account. And it's that need and really getting inside that other person's shoes and saying, "what do you need and how can I really maneuver around to get your needs met, but also my own as well?" So what all of that does is it leads to a higher level of trust. And if you don't have that sense of trust with the people that you're negotiating with, it's just like game over. But if you can get that trust, and if you have a great respect between the parties that are negotiating, that can make all the difference in the world to that successful negotiation. 

Now, when you know, you're Inner Genius Profile, you can then elevate your communication capability to get closer to that Master Negotiator. And so that's why we're here today, I really want to help people unlock their potential and build those really successful communication strategies so that in your next negotiation, you can get that Win-Win outcome. And if you're not familiar with that term, we can go through it as we go through today. But Win-Win is where you get a win for you, and also a win for the other party as well. And that's the ultimate game.

Carl Richards  06:41

Now, negotiation, Catherine is something that we do in everyday life, ask a married person, there's usually some negotiation that does have to happen. How is it applied in everyday life, and not just in the boardroom?

Catherine Mattiske  06:52

You know, the thing is that everyone thinks that that term negotiation is all part of the high level business. It's not, it's part of everyday life. And as you just said, you know, you negotiate every day in your household, you might just be negotiating with your partner on who's to do the dishes. But by the same token, you might be negotiating a multimillion dollar deal and exactly the same principles apply. If you can understand yourself, and you can understand the other party, and you know how to communicate with them in order to reach an agreement. Now that- I'm going to say that 50 times today, the aim of negotiation is to get to an agreement, it's not to have the stakes in the sand, that's adversarial negotiation. So, you don't want to do that. It's all about getting to that agreement. 

And that's what Win-Win means. And Harvard came up with a great definition, actually, in just one of their blogs, and I loved it. And I just think it resonates. Let me tell you what they said the definition of Win-Win, a Win-Win situation is the result of a mutual gains approach. So mutual gains approach to negotiation, in which parties work together to meet the interests and maximize value creation. Now, within that sentence, there is an entire book, right? There's an entire PhD thesis, how do you get the mutual gains approach? That's number one. 

How do you work together? That's number two, how do you understand and uncover people's interests? Because they not may not tell you right up front? And how do you maximize value creation, where you might go into a negotiation and say, This is what I want out of this negotiation, or this is what we need, this is our interests. And then the other party comes in with their interests. But together, you actually maximize that value creation, you create more value for each other than what you originally set out to do in the beginning. Now, it doesn't matter whether you're negotiating with a colleague or family, business partner, whoever it is, it comes down to the basics, being aware of your own strengths, your own motivations, as well as that of the other person, the better you can know and get intel on the other person you're negotiating with, that can make all the difference in the world. And that's that Secret Sauce, really knowing that other person and really getting that communication tight, so that you're communicating in their way.

Carl Richards  09:22

So would you say this is comparatively a higher level of playing to your strengths or, or leveraging those? Yeah?

Catherine Mattiske  09:29

Yeah, yeah, absolutely, Carl. Off the charts. So if you look at the classic Win-Win model, and if you don't know that Win-Win model just Google it right, it'll come up straight away. The classic Win-Win model is a four quadrant grid, and in the top right hand corner is Win-Win. That's where you have high focus on your objectives, that's high. And also you have to focus on their objectives. When you do both of those things. The outcome is Win-Win. You then take that further, and there's a great book on negotiation called Getting to Yes by Fisher and Ury and the third author is Patton, Bruce Patton. And what they said was up in that tippy top right hand corner is Win-Win or No Deal. That's your walkaway position. So that means if you're in a negotiation with me, Carl, I will always win. Okay, I will never lose. Now, how can I say that, because I'm in that top right hand corner, if I can't get a win for me and a win for you, we have a No Deal situation. So I will never go into a negotiation and lose. And I'll never be in that situation, because I go into it with the Win-Win attitude. Or when we No Deal, which means if I can't get the Win-Win for both of us, I walk away. And if you have that philosophy, that's one thing. But what I'm talking about is even taking that further.

So your communication strategy, how on earth can I do that? How do I actually get Win-Win, No Deal that comes down to communication. That's where I come in and say, tap into that Inner Genius, the way you communicate the way you learn the way other people communicate the way they learn. If you can tap into that, you will blitz Win-Win No Deal every time. And I say to clients, you know, if we're negotiating over a big project or whatever, I'll walk away. And by walking away, the respect that I get, is huge. Because I say openly, I can't get a win out of this, you can't get a win. If we can't both win, we're in a situation of No Deal. And that is a respectful position to walk away.

Carl Richards  09:45

 It must take or has taken a while to get to that point where you can articulate that and I think that's the struggle a lot of people have is they don't know when to walk away. They'd rather keep trying to work through it or maybe that's just partly what we've been taught over the years as this is how we do things until we come to a mutual whatever we want to call it. I do want to dive deeper into this Inner Genius, though, and the Genius Quotient as the secret to success and that Secret Sauce, what inspired you to create Inner Genius and GQ.

Catherine Mattiske 12:03

So I've been working on this for a very long time. In fact, my entire career of 30 plus years, that's how old I am, right? Ancient. Zoom is great. And always put your filter on in zoom. That's what I tell everyone. And I do to. I've been working on this my entire career. And the issue that I'm trying to solve, the problem that I'm trying to solve is our language is often misunderstood. And we all want to communicate authentically. But we also want to be heard as well, we all want our messages to land with other people. And we want other people to listen to us and read our emails and respond. And so we can really easily get caught up in the external pressures such as you know, what society expects, what our family expects from us, and so on, without really tuning into our own unique, what I call a Genius Zone.

 So what I wanted to do was to create something that would help people recognize and leverage their own Inner Genius, where do we operate the best? You know, where do we really, when we're working, for example, if we're working on a project, and all of a sudden times flown, because it's just disappeared, and we go "wow, I'm loving doing this." or "I'm doing something I absolutely love." Time doesn't even come into it. Time just disappears. That's your Genius Zone. 

So how do I know A.) What that is? And B.) When I'm in it, the first thing I realized is that my Inner Genius or my Genius Zone is different to everyone else's around me. So then that brings up the next thing of that communication, friction. Because then the things that I love talking about all the things that resonate with me, don't necessarily resonate with other people. So how do you build that translation and getting to that way of communication? And it's all scientifically based, you know, everything's scientifically based. And I had to put all this together to say, how does this actually work? How can we help people? Or how can I help people? Firstly, recognize their Genius Zone. What am I really good at? And some people when they do the profile, Carl go, "that's not me." And then they turn around and go, "oh, hang on a second. I've just like, put a blanket over that part of me. And now that really is me." And so then that is all a natural mirror to how you communicate; the words that you use. And then how do I use different words with different people? That's all that communication piece. 

So when we're talking about negotiation, that's the Secret Sauce because then you can say, because I'm motivated by something in my Genius Zone, then what about the other person that I'm negotiating with? They will have a different Inner Genius Profile to you. Chances are, there's 72 of them, right? So the chances of having exactly the same very limited that's what that's all about, Carl. 

Carl Richards  14:46

In a nutshell. What is someone's Inner Genius.

Catherine Mattiske  14:49

So Inner Genius is your own unique talents, your strengths, your passions, it's what makes you who you are. And when I developed the Inner Genius Profile, I based it on learning science. And that is how people take in information and process it in your brain. And that is different for everybody. When you unlock that, and actually know that and most people walking this planet do not know how their brain works, how do I take in information all day, every day? And how do I process it? Most people can't answer that question. And so that's been my whole life working that out. And once we work that out, and you know that it's your potential to then really tap into it, and open up that world of possibilities. It also teaches you your natural language of communication. And as I just was talking about before, it also reveals how different everyone is around you, and how then you can start to build those bridges with people in communication. So it's a learning and communication profile, all based on learning science.

Carl Richards  16:02

And learning how to communicate with others, obviously doesn't happen overnight, we'll be diving into that in a little bit more detail and how it relates to negotiation today. For those who are new to Inner Genius Zone Catherine, how does someone find out their Inner Genius and get into the Genius Zone.

 Catherine Mattiske  16:18

It takes 10 minutes. The first thing is to identify your Inner Genius archetype, is- that's your unique combination of your talents and strengths, as I just mentioned, and then once you know that, then you know where your Genius Zone is, you know where you resonate the best. You know, where you do your best work. And you know, really that in-depth drivers of who you are and how you show up to the world. Once you've done that, then you start to explore all those components in detail. And then you can start developing strategies to leverage your strengths and your passions and that communication language to really achieve success.

 Carl Richards  16:57

There are many different programs, let's put it that way out there. There's DiSC, there's Myers Briggs, there's Insights, there's Colors, but this is different. How is it different?

 Catherine Mattiske  17:09

Yeah, so it is different. It's very unique. All of the profiles out there, DiSC, Myers Briggs, Insights, all of them, they have a specific role to play. And it's really around choice of what profile is best for you. The Inner Genius Profile goes beyond a mere assessment, if I can put it that way. It gives you not only that insight that I just talked about, but a Toolkit, that once you do your profile, you open up what we call your Inner Genius Vault. And when you go into your vault, there's an entire Toolkit to help you drive your own growth and your performance. And so in there, we have tools for communication, we have your own personalized Spotify playlists. So when you're at your desk, and you need to get into your Genius Zone and really crank up the acceleration on your work, you put that Spotify playlist on and you're away. We have Alexa Skills, all of these things come with the profile to say not only what you are in regard to your own profile, but how you can actually make it work. And that's the difference between the Inner Genius Profile and every other profile out there is that Toolkit that comes with it.

 Carl Richards  18:25

That Toolkit, having taken the test of the profile, the Toolkit is amazing. The playlist actually threw me I'm like, she knows what I like to get into the Zone or be in the Zone. But with the Inner Genius Profile. And thank you, by the way for creating that playlist. It's been a phenomenal tool that I use on a regular basis.

 Catherine Mattiske  18:45

Well yours is different from mine, Carl. So yours does nothing for me. So your playlist for your archetype is completely different to mine. And so I've played you're playlist 'cause sometimes I think "I'll just play someone else's And I'd (be) sitting there go, this is not working for me. So it's all very personalized.

 Carl Richards  19:02

So is there crossover with something like that? Just- 

 Catherine Mattiske  19:04

No

 Carl Richards  19:04

Or is there never- Okay, interesting. Okay.

 Catherine Mattiske  19:06

But for the 12 different archetypes, you each have your own playlist? Yeah.

 Carl Richards  19:10

Interesting. Okay. I love it. With the Inner Genius Profile. It's a learning and communication profile. So what's the science of learning behind it?

 Catherine Mattiske  19:19

So I've just published on the GQ Academy and scientific paper, but this is based on decades of research by me in the latest thinking on neuroscience in cognitive psychology, personality theory, organizational behavior, learning science, the whole thing. But what I'm most interested in personally, is this really cutting edge brain research. When you look at other profiles on the market, some of them are like 50, 170 years old, and the brain research wasn't around then. We are getting so much research on how people learn and communicate this natural language that we all have that's different to each other. That's what I did to pull that research in to identify those learning and communication preferences and your underlying motivators, and what makes somebody more productive in their work environment. 

And also having these higher rates of meaningful engagement through communication. All of this is brand new. I started my research though, and thought, "I'm going back to the beginning." Because I'm a real science geek, I absolutely love it, I went back and my first person that I researched was Aristotle. And everyone in between, and so in that scientific paper, you can see the researchers that I researched, and the basis of everything, and that's where it came from. So a compilation of decades of work.

 Carl Richards  20:46

Wow. So when you say brain research are you also including as part of that neuroplasticity, or retraining?

 Catherine Mattiske  20:52

A lot. look I've been from A to Z on the entire thing. 

 Carl Richards  20:55

Okay

 Catherine Mattiske  20:57

Every day, new research comes out. And I'm the nerd that sits and reads it, because I think there will be more and more and more, because it's just coming out at such an accelerated pace now, because of technology, we're able to do a lot more than we were even 10 years ago, 20 years ago. So, it's just changing all the time and I'll keep ahead of it and I'll keep pulling things in that are interesting, and adapting and changing as it needs to. So different archetypes use different language. So the key is, especially in a negotiation is that what we're talking about today, is talking to people in their way. So, Carl you have a different archetype to me, if we were negotiating together, in order to really build that bond between us, your Secret Sauce would be to say, how do I talk to the Futurist, Catherine's a Futurist. How do I use her language, and speak in that different language. So let me give you a little analogy.

 Carl Richards  21:57

Yeah.

 Catherine Mattiske  21:58

Imagine you've got like, four people of the world, and one speaks, say Portuguese, and other one Greek, another one English, and another one French. So when you're learning the art of negotiation, it's like trying to communicate with people who speak a different language. So if you speak Portuguese but the other person only speaks Greek, your attempts at communication will be unsuccessful, no matter how hard you try. And the same goes for negotiation, if you're not familiar with the natural language and strategies of each party, so their archetype with each party, it can be really difficult to reach a successful agreement. Now, it's like speaking Portuguese, and the other person is Greek, or English or French, understanding every person at the negotiating table, every person's language is really essential. And that's the Secret Sauce for successful negotiation. So when you do your profile, you can understand your own communication language, then you start to learn the languages of other people to allow you to build those really strong negotiation strategies.

 Carl Richards  23:06

Can you give an everyday example of how this has maybe happened? Or how it's come up with your own negotiations?

 Catherine Mattiske  23:12

Well, let me give you a real life story from a client. Okay? And so, there was a high stakes negotiation going on between different department heads. It's a large pharmaceutical company, and they're my client. I'd met the three people, the three department heads, I'd met them all before individually. I can talk to people for a couple of sentences, and I know what their archetype is, because they've been to this stuff right, so I can spot it immediately. As soon as I get on a zoom call with someone and I say, "so whereabouts are you?" Which is my standard line in a zoom call 'cause I'm in Australia, and they're not necessarily and they always tell me. By the time they finish that sentence, I know their profile, because I can pick it up, right? It's a skill, and anyone can learn that skill. It just takes a while. 

So these three people, their profiles were The Decrypter, The Mason and The Futurist. So I knew that but they didn't, Okay? So that- I was asked to be consultant in this negotiation. And there was a first negotiation meeting. And so I was just observing here. Okay, so here's what happened. The three people sat down at a boardroom table. Now at the head of the table was The Decrypter. Now the Decrypters first priority was to create a sense of connection and understanding between everyone there, okay? So, she was really good at using her empathy, her interpersonal communication skills, and she quickly wants to build trust with everyone in the room, right? Creating an environment where everyone feels comfortable negotiating. 

At the other end of the table was The Mason. Now The Mason, he was focused on getting things done and Masons create order out of chaos. So he's used his planning and problem solving skills to create clarity around the deal in the beginning, and start driving results and trying to get everybody to get what they wanted out of it. 

Now in the center of the table was an oval table right picture that was The Futurist, someone like me. So I'm in the corner, that person used their creative and innovative skills to really create a vision for what could be. Now, they were asking questions around the possibilities and they we're motivating everyone in the room to take risks, because that's what I do, foster an environment where there's real growth and opportunity. So that was the lay of the land.

 Carl Richards  23:12

Wow. This is phenomenal information and, you know, very insightful. Talk about things that you do during a negotiation. So, as a lot of communication skills, it does come down to, in some cases, trust and rapport. So how do you develop trust and rapport during a negotiation?

 Catherine Mattiske  25:46

So I think there's three main ways one is through active listening. The second is by being really present, and very attentive to what's being said at all times, like, get off your phone, put your laptop away, your attention, and being present is absolutely paramount. And the third thing is learning to ask high impact questions. So by demonstrating your interest, you have to demonstrate your interest in the other person's situation, to really get in their shoes to make sure that they are heard, and to showing respect for their views, and then starting to build that strong foundation of trust with them.

 Carl Richards  26:31

Now, you mentioned the active listening. Are there some simple tricks that you can use to listen better? It's a very important part of the communication process obviously.

 Catherine Mattiske  26:41

And Carl, people are terrible at listening. And why?  Not because I'm judgy about them. But because we've never been taught. We've been taught all the other communication ways; we've been taught how to read, we've been taught how to write, we're taught how to talk. We're never taught how to listen. And so there's some few simple tricks that you can do. And you can do it in your next conversation, your next meeting today, practice active listening in every conversation today, that can be your today task. So today's challenge is firstly, get rid of distractions, okay? And focus on what the other person is saying to make sure that you understand it completely. 

Now to send that signal that you're actively listening. The second thing is repeat back key pieces of information, it verifies what people have said, and they'll tell you if you're wrong, which is great, because then you know that you're on the right track. But secondly, it tells them that you've been listening. Third is ask follow up questions. You can't ask a high impact question if you haven't been listening. Fact. Because your brain doesn't know what to say, right? So you have to actually- to provide meaningful feedback and to again, it tells the person that they've been heard and that they're respected, ask those follow up questions.

 And last is probably the hardest. And it's all around bias. Avoid making assumptions and don't be judgy. Okay? Be empathetic to their point of view. And even if you completely disagree with their point of view, and I'm pretty transparent in my face, like if I disagree with someone they know it. So I've had to really practice the skill of just taking a stand and almost feeling like laying cards on a table side by side, my point of view is one card, their point of view is another. And that's okay. How hard is that to do? For me? It's really, really hard.

 Carl Richards  28:41

What are some of those high impact questions that people can ask during negotiations?

 Catherine Mattiske  28:45

I have a set of five questions that I have memorized. And I know I ask in most negotiations, and I'm happy to share that with you. So my five questions are; Number one is a question around primary objectives. So I might say, "what are the primary objectives and goals for you in this negotiation?" I always ask that up front. 

The next one is around outcome. So I might ask the question around "what is the most crucial outcome or the most important outcome or the most positive outcome that you would like to see from this negotiation?" There's something about objectives and about outcome. 

The next one is around mutual goals. Why do I want to know about mutual goals? Because I'm setting up an environment for Win-Win. So I say something like, "how do you think we can best achieve our mutual goals?" Wow, that is a power question. Because then the other person has to tell me that they understand what my mutual goal is. If they say, "I don't know what your goal is", guess what I'm going to say; "here it is." And then I'm going to ask a question, "so how do you think we can achieve that?" It puts them back in but now we're not doing stakes in the sand adversarial negotiation we're now doing collaborative mutual, mutual Win-Win negotiation. 

Number four is around the detail. And I ask a closed question here every time and what I want from that is a "no" answer. And my close question is; "are there any areas that you need more clarification on or more detail?" What I want to hear is no. Often I hear yes. And then I keep asking that question until I get the no answer. So until I've exhausted everything that they need, eventually, they will say no to that, and then we can move on. 

And then I ask, it's a passive question, but it's an empathetic question. And my question is; "what do you need from me to make this negotiation successful?" All of those five questions around objectives around the outcome around mutual goals, and I've memorized these so I can do it around the clarification of details and around what do you need from me, I ask those all the time. 

And by asking those questions, I can then gain a much better understanding of the situation. And ensure that both parties, me and them, both understand what needs we both want, in order for that negotiation to be successful. And note down those questions for anyone that's listening, use them on your family, use them on your friends, use them at work, use them in negotiation, they're winners.

 Carl Richards  31:31

During negotiations, things can go wrong, or things can run off the rails. And that's never happened, right? Emotions can run high. How could we maintain composure and remain calm in difficult situations like that?

 Catherine Mattiske  31:44

Well, it's a skill. And it's a skill that honestly I've had to learn because I am fiery. And when emotions start to run high, it's difficult for me to remain with that focus and try to get that best outcome. So my key to success of what I've done, and maybe it will work for other people I'm happy to share it, is tackle the emotions before they start. So what I do is I set ground rules at the beginning of the negotiation. So that allows everyone to get involved and say, here's what is acceptable and unacceptable within the boundaries of this conversation, and we list it out. Because then at any time, if emotions are running high, we can go back to that list and say "you know what, we said that that sort of thing was unacceptable. Let's just park that, because we don't want to go there. We agreed at that beginning." So if you do it at the beginning, you can then come back to it. 

The second thing is; often I'll take a few minutes to pause the conversation, and then regroup later. How do I do that? I go to the bathroom. And I say, let's just stop here. If it's okay, I just need to use the bathroom. And then I come back. By going to the bathroom. Even if I need to go or not, right? It gives me a time to reflect. And a chance for me to remember my Genius Zone to start to think about, okay, who have I got around the table? What's there Inner Genius archetype? How can I get them to succeed? How can I get that synergy going. I can then start to get that clarity and I can get back my calm and composure. By focusing on who I've got around the table, what their strengths are what they bring to the negotiation that I can leverage, and try and get that Win-Win.

 Carl Richards  33:20

Catherine, before you go, and just another minute. So thank you for your patience today. But I want to give you the opportunity to share with people how they can connect with you and get a hold of you after today.

 Catherine Mattiske  33:31

Super easy. Just go to my LinkedIn profile. And just send me a message there and just say, "hey, I'd love this for my organization." Book in a coffee chat with me, and I'll come on to zoom with you. There's also on LinkedIn, The Genius Zone Group. And I also publish a weekly newsletter to the GQ Playbook. So subscribe to that, join The Genius Zone Group, there's two websites, and we can probably put these into the chat. Thegeniusquotient.com is the main website. We've also launched the GQ Academy, and that right now is free to join. So will probably not be free forever. But right now, because we've just launched that go to GQ Academy. All of the blogs are there that I've written, all of the press articles where I've been in the press are there, everything is there, the scientific paper is there. And all of the programs and resources that you need are in GQ Academy.

 Carl Richards  34:26

And all of that information is now in the chat. So definitely follow Catherine, you will learn a lot from Catherine, the more you follow her for sure. And once again, thank you, Catherine for a great session, and we're looking forward to seeing you at our next session.

 Catherine Mattiske  34:40

Thanks, Carl. Thanks, everyone!

 Carl Richards  34:45

Thanks for listening to the Genius Zone. If you like what you heard today, leave us a comment or review. Make sure to subscribe to our channel and don't forget to follow Catherine on social media. Be sure to join us again soon in the Genius Zone.